Drink urine and you will heal yourself

Things that people do to be healthier and more beautiful...
I have came across this therapy called “urine therapy” where you basically drink your own urine or massage it on to your body and this suppose to “heal” or “improve” all sorts of things that people are dealing with in every days life. 

 Urine has been used as alternative medicine for centuries and in a lot of cultures it is believed that urine can act as a panacea (all-healing medicine). It is said that it can prevent, cure and maintain your health and even you can rejuvenate and beautify yourself by drinking it on regular basis.
Some advocates believe that the Bible recommends drinking urine. It says: "Drink waters from thy own cistern, flowing water from thy own well.”

This “therapy” can be used for healing different things such as: snake bites, allergies, tooth pain, asthma, severe heart condition, cancer, chemical intoxication, sexually transmitted diseases including AIDS, hepatitis, baldness, Parkinson’s disease, diabetes, obesity, stroke… Some people drink urine to have clear skin and to lose weight, to slow down aging and all this things.

Now, that you got some info about this therapy let’s have a look at this from a common sense perspective:
Why would you drink your own pee when your body is clearly telling you that this is what it doesn’t need? It is meant to go out. Simple as that.  So in the future we will start to hear how your own shit is good for your skin and then women (or men) will have facial because it suppose to reduce wrinkles on your face or what?

We programmed ourselves over the years so much, that what we do makes no sense anymore. Investigate Desteni where you will find out what LIFE really is.  

Is Barbie based on a German sex doll?

I always wanted a Barbie to play with as a child so I nagged to my mother to buy me one (or two or three...). Yes, eventually I wasn't satisfied with only one doll; I wanted to have all of them, including Barbie car and house of course. I remember my neighbor had a wide collection of Barbie’s and I was at her place every day because she had all of the “good stuff”. I secretly envy her because she had Barbie speedboat, a car, house, horse, cool Barbie clothes and shoes and also I envy her because she had Ken. Yes, yes…the Ken doll was really exciting because we could play like we were in real life. I could call it “a perfect life”, because Barbie and Ken had all! Besides house, cars and all of this stuff, they also had (or they still do) perfect bodies and great relationship which was based on (believe it or not) – sex. As we played with dolls we eventually end up with the scene when Barbie and Ken were having sex.

Anorexic Barbie

 Let’s have a look at the origin of Barbie doll:
The origin of Barbie doll can be traced back to Lilli. Lilli was a character in a German comic strip and she was (as others describes her) sassy, ambitious and she favored boyfriends with a lot of money. Later on they decided to make a Lilli doll, which was originally marketed to adults in bars and tobacco shops as a gag gift or a joke. Lilli’s first advertisements called her “the star of every little bar and many refer to Lilli as a “sex toy”. Ruth Handler (the creator of Barbie) was on a trip to Germany and she discovered Lilli doll. She believed that that kind of doll would enable girls (like her daughter) to imagine themselves in future also in other roles than just being a mother (because at that time, there were just baby dolls mostly). And voila! Barbie was created.

But what does Barbie really represents? There are several points to consider:

• Her body image is way below normal

If Barbie was real human being she would walk on all fours because of her body proportion. In 1965 Slumber Party Barbie was introduced and it came out with a bathroom scale permanently set on 110 lbs (which is approximately 50 kg) and a miniature book with the title “How to lose weight” – inside was a simple advice “Don’t eat”. What message is that sending to young girls all over the world? Just don’t eat and you will look as skinny as Barbie, or what? Are they serious?!

Miniature book with "great" advice inside

Here I could point out also all the commercials and advertisements of beautiful, skinny, flawless women where they are advertising everything else but a product. But this is a different story…maybe I will talk about this one in other blog. But just to explain what I mean with one word – most of the ads you see are selling sex.  

•  A need to be materialistic

Barbie would be nothing without her convertible! Oh, and she needs this house and a whole closet of clothes and shoes…Really? From first hand I know that this is how it is…I also wanted everything as I said at the beginning. Here is a good perspective from an article - Barbie's Effects on American Suburban Culture: “Barbie portrays the doll who could do anything. Her world is open for her. She reflects the time period during the beginning of suburbia where middle class families felt that they had the world open to them because of their new positions in suburbs. Barbie's many accessories represented the high consumption lifestyle of these new suburbanites. She had her dream house, completely furnished, a racy sports car, and a wardrobe that expanded almost every day. The economy was booming and consumerism was on the rise and this was shown in the objects and "necessities" that Barbie possessed. This shows that the majority of consumers of Barbie and her accessories were of the suburban middle class. This also holds true for the materialism in today's society. Individuals are constantly striving to own more and more. As Michelle Sit points out, the amount of accessories that children owned of Barbie could be tied in with their social class. The more accessories, the more money the family had to buy their children toys. Some children may have felt left out in this scenario. The ideals of Barbie are portrayed through this ideal of suburbia that material things are very important.”

• Barbie girl song

Remember that song from Aqua? I sang it all the time when it came out…I was probably in grammar school and I liked that song – dreaming about how cool it would be if I was Barbie while singing that song. I can still hear it in my ears “I’m a Barbie girl, in a Barbie world…life in plastic, it’s fantastic…” Huh, read the lyrics and see what the song is all about:

I'm a Barbie girl in the Barbie world
Life in plastic, it's fantastic
You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere
Imagination, life is your creation

Come on, Barbie, let's go party
I'm a blonde single girl in the fantasy world
Dress me up, take your time, I'm your dollie
You're my doll, rock and roll, feel the glamour and pain
Kiss me here, touch me there, hanky-panky

You can touch, you can play
You can say I'm always yours, oooh whoa

Clearly…it’s about sex! Hanky-panky indeed!

OK...so these are some points that I wanted to share…the conclusion is up to you ;)

Being high is a waste of time

I am dealing with the point of drugs right now since I have noticed that I react every time when someone mentions drugs – especially weed.

I become very stiff and I crawl into my shell completely. I don’t want to talk about anything when this happens. I feel really anxious and uncomfortable. I have tried smoking week a couple of times and I didn’t like the effect of it, because I couldn’t control my body like I wanted and also I went completely in my mind, just thinking about “good” things, wondering about how it would be if this and that happens. I have noticed that I immediately switch into judgmental state of mind when I hear that someone is smoking weed or is taking some other substances that are illegal.

I was like that since I can remember, because everybody around me talked about drugs like they are really bad and were just scaring me what can all happen if I take them and so on. So, basically they influenced on my way of thinking about drugs and believing things that are not necessarily true. I am scared of drugs – just hearing about them is making me scared. And this fear comes from the point that I am afraid of not being in control – afraid to lose myself, lose my direction.

I want to feel my body, control my body like I want and I want to be here in physical reality, not in my mind, because being high is taking me away all this things. When being high, I can’t move my body the way I want because I am like jelly, I can’t concentrate and I just speak bullshit – things that don’t make sense at all. So, when drugs are present in any way what so ever (just in conversation or when someone is taking them) I react, because I am afraid to lose myself, not having complete control.

I also realized that I judge people who smoke weed and this judgment comes also from my childhood because I was growing up with an alcoholic in our house and most of that time I experienced fear because I knew that this person who was drinking wasn’t himself when being drunk. He was completely different person (sometimes really happy and opened for a conversation, and sometimes enraged like if you would release a hungry lion out of the cage). I saw different personalities all the time when he was drunk and I couldn’t stand that. And when I draw a line here and compare those two situations together (being drunk and high), they are almost the same - I can see the change in person, because the behavior is not the same. Because of that, I am almost certain that this fear and judgment has to do with the pas experiences from my childhood.

I am going to look more into detail on this point by writing self forgiveness and I will deal with every single memory and experience, emotion and feeling to get to the bottom of this, step by step, really focusing on every single detail.

Better for me to get started! :)

Starving myself to "look good"?!

I am still struggling to accept myself as who I am – well…to accept my body as it is. I catch myself several times during the day that I think about how I would like my body to look like. I get that kind of thoughts mostly when I watch television or when I browse through magazines where all these pictures are seen (especially now when summer is around the corner and a lot of pictures represent hot chicks in bikinis). So I often get thoughts like “From now on, I will starve myself so I will be skinny” or “I will go run tomorrow and I will eat healthy from tomorrow on” or “I will only eat one can of tuna and fruit per day” because of my desire to look like those girls in pictures and on TV – even though I do not do that then. But I realized that this is really insane (even though I still get those thoughts now and then…). Why insane? Well…there are a lot of reasons for that – obvious ones…but I would like to point out one or two that are really sad actually.

Here we have all these celebrities who are really skinny (to that point when this is not good for their bodies anymore), starving themselves on purpose just to look “good” and on the other side, we have half (or even more) of the population who don’t have enough money to buy food, who struggle to survive through the day because they don’t have nothing to live from…Isn’t this ironic? Here, people intentionally starve themselves to be skinny and there people die from starvation?  

And another polarity is when people overeat themselves, having problems with increased cholesterol level, can’t walk 10 meters without being out of breath and then we have again starving people all over the world.

We have to look around people. What are we doing…it is insanity. We do not appreciate the food that is given to us at all! We just take and take and take, not taking into consideration anyone else but ourselves. It is time to change and Desteni is the right place to start. Investigate Desteni I Process and Equal Money! Let’s start changing the World to a better place!

Allergy and irritation

I have a really bad cold mixed with wisdom tooth pain (from growing) and allergy to pollen. So - everything combined – not cool.

I became allergic to pollen a few years ago in high school. At first, I didn’t know that this is allergy; I just thought that I have a cold, because my nose was all blocked up and I sneezed a lot. But the next year at that time of the year it happened again, because I have noticed that it got worse when I am out, close to grass. So, I started to take medicine to ease the symptoms. But one year it got worse – to the point when I couldn’t breathe normally. My chest was wheezing, my nostrils were blocked up completely, my eyes were red from irritation and my throat was hurting like I was having angina. This year is again “the bad year” – this depends on the concentration of the pollen in the air. 

Every year when this allergy starts, my right down wisdom tooth starts to grow at the same time, so I have to deal with some pain and unpleasantness because of this. This year (this is now the third year) it was super fun, because I caught a cold also. So my right side of my face was little swallowed and I also had headaches, so I haven’t got a good sleep for a week now. It is getting better now, but this was a reminder that I have to work on something. Maybe this allergy has a connection with “irritation” towards my family, because I am very annoyed by them when someone asks me something. I change my behavior in front of them, I become nervous and rude for no reason. And I just can’t control my reaction – but I know I didn’t try hard enough. This wisdom tooth…I can’t connect it to anything at the moment.

Because of the cold, my senses for smell and taste got weak and I have noticed that I don’t have appetite, since I don’t taste or smell anything when eating food. This is pretty cool because now I eat when I am hungry and I don’t care what is on the menu because it isn’t matter – I don’t taste it anyway. I just realized that more than half of the food I eat is because it tastes or smells good (and I am talking about food that my body doesn’t need, for example chocolate, mayonnaise, ketchup, chips, juice, cookies, snacks…etc) and I usually overeat. Sometimes when something “good” is for lunch, I would eat until my stomach hurts even though I could throw up the next second. And this is really unacceptable because when writing this I see that I don’t appreciate the food or my body, I act egoistic because all I do is to please myself (my mind) when doing this, to get this satisfaction within myself.

I do not accept and allow doing this anymore.

Is Heaven on Earth possible?

Yesterday, I caught myself complaining about my job while talking to someone and I have noticed that I wanted her to feel sorry for me (like how I am poor because I work for low wage and every day including weekends and holydays, not really good working time, etc.).But then I was like “What the f***?!”- I am complaining here because I HAVE the job while others can’t even get it and I can afford things like more than a half of the world can’t…Imagine all the people who have to work all day (for 15 hours or more per day) and who get paid like 2$ per day or even less than that. 

Now…the question I have asked myself was how would I survive with 2$ per day? I couldn’t. These people (including children) have to work in terrible conditions, they can barely support themselves, have no shelter, food…And for what? So people in elite countries can buy a pair of Nike shoes for 100$ or more, when they in fact cost less than 5$ to make.

The real solution is here – Equal Money System, where all life will be treated equally from birth to death.

Investigate Equal Money System and join us, so we can create real HEAVEN ON EARTH for ALL!

I wish I could be skinnier - SF

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect seeing myself in the mirror to the thought “I have gained weight again. I wish I could be skinnier.”

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing seeing myself in the mirror to exist as a trigger point within me, which triggers the thought of “I have gained weight again. I wish I could be skinnier”.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect hard to zip up my pants because they are too tight to the thought “I gained weight again. I wish I could be skinnier.”

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself that getting dressed and realize that the pants are too tight exists as a trigger point within me, which triggers the thought of “I gained weight again. I wish I could be skinnier”.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to want/desire to be skinnier.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing the desire/want to be skinnier to exist within and as me.

Previous script on trigger point:

Whenever I see myself in the mirror or when I see that my clothes are too small, a thought “I have gained weight again. I wish I could be skinnier.” comes up – thinking if I was skinnier, I would be more confident and beautiful, I would not experience worries within myself about what will other think about my body.

New script on trigger point:

Whenever I see myself in a mirror or getting dressed and see that my pants doesn’t fit – I stop, I breathe – I do not accept or allow myself to separate myself from reality desiring and wishing to be skinnier, thinking and believing that I would be worriless and beautiful. Also I do not accept and allow myself to compare with other beings – instead I realize that I am here, one and equal with myself and other beings and with my body. I do not allow myself to separate myself from my physical body.

Specific type/’shade’ of Emotion or Feeling:

Sadness: disappointment, frustration, misery

Anger: jealousy towards others

Discomfort, dislike

Reason for connecting Thought to Emotion/Feeling:

I am disappointed in myself because I didn’t keep up with my diet and I let this happen – gaining weight (not having “perfect body”). Also I am disappointed in myself because I don’t have persistence to work out at home by myself.

I am frustrated because my body is not how I would like it to be.

I am feeling miserable because of the way my body looks like.

I am jealous towards other women who have body that I desire about. And also I am jealous towards women who are confident in their skin and don’t worry about their appearance.

I am angry with myself because I have gained weight, because I don’t watch what I eat, because I over eat, because I judge myself.

I feel discomfort while watching myself in the mirror because I don’t like how my body looks like.

I feel dislike when I see myself in the mirror because I don’t like my body image and my curves around waist area.

Self-Forgiveness on Connecting Thought with Emotion/Feeling and Reason for Connection:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the thought “I have gained weight again. I wish I could be skinnier” to an emotional experience of disappointment, because I am not pleased with myself and the way I look.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate within an emotional experience of disappointment because I am not self disciplined enough to eat what my body really needs.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate within an emotional experience of disappointment because I have gained weight.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate within an emotional experience of disappointment because I realize that I don’t have persistence and self will to work out at home by myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself that I need somebody that will push me through exercises, because I realize that I don’t want to do this by myself, alone.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate within an emotional experience of disappointment because I desire/want my body to be skinnier.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself as fat, because I want my body to be skinnier.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I am fat.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to desire eating a lot of food even though I am not hungry.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the thought “I have gained weight again. I wish I could be skinnier” to an emotional experience of frustration, because I want my body to be skinnier than it is.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate within an emotional experience of frustration, because I don’t like how my body looks like when I am looking myself into a mirror.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to judge myself on the way my body looks.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hold on to definitions of a “perfect” body and how body should look like that I see on TV or magazines.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the thought “I have gained weight again. I want to be skinnier” to an emotional experience of misery, because I am not happy with how my body looks like and I want to be skinny as I was a few months ago.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate within an emotional experience of misery, because of the way my body looks.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the thought “I have gained weight again. I want to be skinnier” to an emotional experience of jealousy, because I envy other women who have a body that I want to have.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to envy other women because of their looks.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate within an emotional experience of jealousy, because I compare myself with other women about their body.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to compare with other women about our looks.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate within an emotional experience of jealousy towards other women, because I want/desire to have a body like them.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be jealous on women who are skinny because I want to be like them.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to judge myself because I am participating within an emotional experience of jealousy towards other women.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate within an emotional experience of jealousy towards women who are confident.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to desire/want to be confident.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself as unconfident, because I don’t have “perfect” body.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that women who are confident don’t worry about their appearance.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the thought “I have gained weight again. I wish I could be skinnier” to an emotion experience of anger because I gained weight.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate within an emotional experience of anger because I have gained weight.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate within an emotional experience of anger because I don’t watch what I eat.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I gained weight because I don’t watch what I eat.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate within an emotional experience of anger because I overeat.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to judge myself because I eat when I am not hungry.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to judge myself because I overeat.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I am addicted to food.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself as food junkie, because I eat when I am not hungry and I overeat.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself as unattractive because I gained weight.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the thought “I have gained weight again. I wish I could be skinnier” to an emotional experience of discomfort because I don’t like how my body looks like.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate within an emotional experience of discomfort because I don’t like how my body looks.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel discomfort within myself when I see other confident women, because I feel inferior towards confident women.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel inferior towards confident women because I believe that I have nothing to be proud of on my body.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to experience discomfort within myself because I am not confident enough.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the thought “I have gained weight again. I wish I could be skinnier” to a emotional experience of dislike, because I judge how my body looks like.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate within an emotional experience of dislike because I don’t like how my body looks like when I see myself in the mirror.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to judge my body the way it looks.

I realize and accept myself as one and equal as my body – my body and I are equal and one.

I realize that I need to take responsibility for what I have accepted and allowed, I have to start to stand on my own and stop to depend on others, stop to let others to take responsibility instead of me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate in emotions, feelings and thoughts towards gaining weight, instead of realizing that my body is trying to tell me something that needs to be corrected.

I do not accept and allow myself to separate myself from other women through trying to see myself through their eyes.

I do not accept and allow myself to separate myself from other women through comparing myself to them – I am one and equal as other women and I do not accept anything less than that.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to leave in the past (wishing to look like a few months ago) instead of realizing that I am not the past, I am here as I am, in the moment of every breath.

I do not accept or allow myself to participate in jealousy, because I realize and accept that I and other women are one and equal and because of that I realize that there is nothing that other women have that I don’t.

I do not accept and allow myself to create beliefs towards other women.

I realize that I don’t eat what my body really needs, instead of eating what is best for my body, I eat what my mind wants and desire, therefore I do not accept and allow myself to eat what my mind desires, I will eat what my body needs.

Words, pictures and memories:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to charge the word “beauty” with a positive value.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to judge the word “beauty” as ‘good’/ ‘positive’/ ‘right’ within my mind.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word “beauty” through judging the word ‘Freedom’ as ‘good’/ ‘positive’/ ‘right’.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word “beauty” to a memory of me being skinnier and fitter.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word “beauty” within a memory of me being skinnier and fitter.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from word “beauty” and from a memory of me being skinnier and fitter through defining word “beauty” within being skinnier and fitter in separation of myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word “beauty” to toned body.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word “beauty” within toned body.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from word “beauty” and from toned body through defining word “beauty” within toned boy in separation of myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word “beauty” to makeup.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word “beauty” within makeup.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from word “beauty” and from makeup through defining word “beauty” within makeup in separation of myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word “beauty” to a picture of me starving myself and feeling miserable.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word “beauty” within a picture of me starving myself and feeling miserable.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from word “beauty” and from a picture of me starving and being miserable through defining word “beauty” within a picture of me starving and feeling miserable in separation of myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word “beauty” to Tyra Banks.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word “beauty” to Tyra Banks.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word “beauty” and from Tyra Banks through defining word “beauty” within Tyra Banks in separation of myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word “beauty” to a picture of a six pack abs.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word “beauty” within six pack abs.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word “beauty” and from six pack abs through defining word “beauty” within six pack abs in separation of myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word “beauty” to flawless skin.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word “beauty” within flawless skin.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word “beauty” and from flawless skin through defining word “beauty” within flawless skin in separation of myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word “beauty” to perfection.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word “beauty” within perfection.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from word “beauty” and from perfection through defining word “beauty” within perfection in separation of myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word “beauty” to money.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word “beauty” within money.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word “beauty” and from money through defining word “beauty” within money in separation of myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word “beauty” to health.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word “beauty” within health.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word “beauty” and from health through defining word “beauty” within health in separation of myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word “beauty” to long, dark hair.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word “beauty” within long, dark hair.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word “beauty” and from long, dark hair through defining word “beauty” within long, dark hair in separation of myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word “beauty” to a picture of a woman getting a massage.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word “beauty” within a picture of a woman getting a relaxing massage.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word “beauty” and from a picture of a woman getting a relaxing massage through defining word “beauty” within a picture of a woman getting a massage in separation of myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word “beauty” to a memory of me going to the gym every day.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word “beauty” within a memory of me going to the gym every day.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word “beauty” and from a memory of me going to the gym every day through defining word “beauty” within a memory of me going to the gym every day in separation of myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word “beauty” to a pink lily flower with white stripes.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word “beauty” within a pink lily flower with white stripes.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from word “beauty” and from a pink lily flower with white stripes in separation of myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word “beauty” in polarity according to the word ugly.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the world “beauty” and from word ugly through defining “beauty” in polarity according to the word ugly, in separation of myself.

Previous definition of the word beauty:

Something that is “perfect” on the outside looking it from the perspective of the mind. Seeing images of celebrities that you can see on TV or in magazines through my physical eyes

New definition of the word beauty:

Beauty as self expression, as me as who I am. Perfection of self – meaning to leave as one and equal as life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to charge the word “confidence” with a positive value.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to judge the word “confidence” as ‘good’/ ‘positive’/ ‘right’ within my mind.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word “confidence” through judging the word ‘Freedom’ as ‘good’/ ‘positive’/ ‘right’.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word “confidence” to a memory when I was walking home from school and some students were making fun of me and I was ashamed and was looking down on the ground.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word “confidence” within a memory of me walking home from school and being ashamed.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word “confidence” and from a memory of me walking home from school and feeling ashamed through defining word “confidence” within a memory of me being ashamed in separation of myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word “confidence” to a business woman dressed in business clothes.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word “confidence” within a business woman dressed in business clothes.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word “confidence” and from a business woman dressed in business clothes through defining word “confidence” within a business woman dressed in business clothes in separation of myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word “confidence” to control.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word “confidence” within control.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word “confidence” and from control through defining word “confidence” within control in separation of myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word “confidence” to a feeling of relief.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word “confidence” within a feeling of relief.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word “confidence” and from a feeling of relief through defining word “confidence” within a feeling of relief in separation of myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word “confidence” to pride.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word “confidence” within pride.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from word “confidence” and from pride through defining word “confidence” within pride in separation of myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word “confidence” to a picture of me standing fearless in front of my professors while I am having a presentation of my diploma.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to defining the word “confidence” within a picture of me standing fearless while having a presentation of my diploma in front of my professors.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word “confidence” and from a picture of me standing fearless and having a presentation of my diploma through defining word “confidence” within a picture of me standing fearless and having a presentation of my diploma in separation of myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word “confidence” to fearless.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word “confidence” within fearless.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word “confidence” and from fearless through defining word “confidence” within fearless in separation of myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word “confidence” to a picture of me, holding my head high.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word “confidence” within a picture of me, holding my head high.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word “confidence” and from a picture of me holding my head high through defining word “confidence” within a picture of me holding my head high in separation of myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word “confidence” to a memory of me reading an article about rising up your confidence.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word “confidence” within a memory of reading an article about rising up your confidence.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word “confidence” and from a memory of reading an article through defining word “confidence” within a memory of reading an article in separation of myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word “confidence” to standing up for myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word “confidence” within standing up for myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word “confidence” and from standing up for myself through defining word “confidence” within standing up for myself in separation of myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word “confidence” to power.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word “confidence” within power.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word “confidence” and from power through defining word “confidence” within power in separation of myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word “confidence” in polarity according to the word unconfidence.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word “confidence” and from the word unconfidence through defining “confidence” in polarity according to the word unconfidence, in separation of myself.

Old definition of the word confidence:

Something or somebody who has power and control over oneself, being fearless and direct, having trust in oneself.

New definition of the word confidence:

Accepting myself as one and equal to other beings and standing as one and equal in every breath.

Self-Forgiveness on Picture as a whole, details of the picture, what the picture represents and Connection to the thought:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing a picture of me standing and watching on a scale with a reflection of myself in a mirror at the background in an empty room – to exist within and as me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the picture of me standing on a scale to the thought “I have gained weight again. I wish I could be skinnier”.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect frustration, prejudice and unhappiness to a picture in my mind of me standing and watching on a scale with a reflection of myself in the mirror at the background in an empty room.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the words frustration, prejudice and unhappiness within a picture in my mind of me standing and watching on a scale with a reflection of myself in the mirror at the background in an empty room.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from frustration, prejudice and unhappiness through defining the words in separation of myself within a picture of me standing and watching on a scale.

Complete unfolding of Memory 1:

I remember the time when I was going to the gym every day to aerobic lessons. I was working out really hard and I was having fun while exercising – we were singing the songs together with the group and instructor, enjoying the music. I remember a big smile on my face and a lot of sweating and determination.

Another memory came up and this one was when I was skinnier and I felt good because of that. I was getting all kinds of attention because I lost some weight and everybody was having something to say. I remember one moment when I was in the kitchen standing beside the kitchen counter and my father looked at me and said that I will break on half and that my body is too thin (he was appalled) and I liked that. I felt comfortable in my body and I was more confident.

Relevant points within the Memory 1:

•    aerobic lessons

•    having fun

Reason for holding on to the Memory 1:

Defining beauty according to this memory of me getting to aerobics every day

Self-Forgiveness on Memory 1:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect a memory of going to the gym every day and enjoying exercising and having fun, to the thought “I have gained weight again. I wish I could be skinnier”.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hold on to the memory of me going to the gym every day and enjoying exercising and having fun.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have defined my beauty within a memory of me going to the gym every day and having fun while exercising.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from beauty through defining it within a memory of me going to the gym every day and having fun while exercising, in separation of myself.

Complete unfolding of Memory 2:

Another memory came up and this one was when I was skinnier and I felt good because of that. I was getting all kinds of attention because I lost some weight and everybody was having something to say. I remember one moment when I was in the kitchen standing beside the kitchen counter and my father looked at me and said that I will break on half and that my body is too thin (he was appalled) and I liked that. I felt comfortable in my body and I was more confident.

Relevant points within the Memory 2:

•    being skinnier

•    getting attention

•    fathers reaction

•    being comfortable and confident

Reason for holding on to the Memory 2:

A want and desire to be skinny again and getting attention and also defining beauty according to this memory.

Self-Forgiveness on Memory 2:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the memory of me being skinnier and getting attention from people like my father and their reactions and a feeling of being comfortable and confident because of that, to a thought “I have gained weight again. I wish I could be skinnier”.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hold on to a memory of me being skinnier and getting all this attention from other people, including my father’s reaction and a feeling of being comfortable and confident because of that.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have defined a want and desire to be skinny again and to have defined beauty within a memory of me being skinnier and getting attention, feeling confident and comfortable.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hold on to a memory of me being skinnier because I desire to be skinnier like I was in the past.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hold on to a memory of being skinnier and getting attention because I want to feel special.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word “special” to a memory of me being skinnier and getting attention.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word “special” within a memory of me being skinnier and getting attention.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from word “special” and from a memory of me being skinnier and getting attention through defining word “special” within a memory of me being skinnier and getting attention in separation of myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word special in polarity according to the words worthless and unimportant.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word “special” and from words worthless and unimportant through defining “special” in polarity according to the words unimportant and worthless, in separation of myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hold on to a memory of me getting a reaction from my father because I was skinny, because I felt special and noticeable in his eyes and I desire to be special and noticeable in my father’s eyes.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for wanting and desiring to be noticeable and special in my father’s eyes because I want to have his attention.