No more racism as you'll not fear others from being intruding your country for money

With equal money system racism will ultimately stop in a very short period of time as races will not have to compete among each other as they do today, because of the apparent differences between various races of earth. Today the competition among races of humanity is mostly driven by religion and money as some have less and others have more, which happened because of the set up of the current money system- where some win and others loose. Races will no longer need to stand together as a form of families that have to protect their money and their god, because there will be only one god as the equal money system and all will have access to everything which makes life on earth worth while.

Calling people on the phone

For my diploma I had to call some »important« people who are in charge for logistics in the company. These companies are giants for Slovenians market, so it is hard to reach them and contact them. I had to call over 10 companies, because this is the first step of my practical part of my diploma. When my mentor told me that my assignment is based on calling people and introducing them the project we are working on and ask them if they are prepared to cooperate and give their professional opinion on the project, I became pale. The biggest fear since my childhood has been talking to people, approaching to them, ask them for help or calling somebody on the phone who I don’t know. I always asked my grandmother or my sister to do this kind of things instead of me. My mother knew about my fear so when I asked her if she would call instead of me, she said “no, you will call and arrange what you need”, so she was pushing me through my fear. A lot of the times I tried and asked someone else to call instead of me just because I didn’t want to face with my fear. I would rather leave things alone and not deal with them, for example: if a company sent me a bill they would charge me more than they should, I would just pay more so I don’t need to call them and tell them for the mistake. Some time ago, I started to push myself and do things like that on my own, even though a lot of the times my grandmother offered her to call instead of me. But still I pushed myself and said to her that I will call because this is something that I need to clear and when she is not going to be around I would be forced to deal with it by myself anyways.
My concern mostly was that I will forget what I would like to say and just have empty head. So before I called somewhere, I wrote everything that I meant to say on the paper. My hands were always shaking and my heart was beating like crazy when I picked up the phone and dial the number. Then when somebody answered the phone, my voice was all shaky and different and I spoke very fast. I never tried to correct this by breathing or by writing self forgiveness on this point because back then I didn’t know about this.
So now, when I had to call all the companies I was also scared. I was mostly afraid of rejection and if someone will ask me something that I don’t have an answer to it. I again wrote everything down on a paper and read it through for a few times. I picked up the phone and called first company. The fear was the same as it was in the past, I talked the same, I didn’t slow down and take a moment for myself. I rushed into it. But I was aware of what I was doing. When the first conversation was over, I went back to the start; I tried to remember my feelings and emotions during the call, how I experienced myself in that moment. Then I just took a breath, I didn’t think what I am going to say to the next person, I just start talking. And it was much better. The conversation was more relaxed. Every call I made next, it was easier for me, and my fear was getting smaller and smaller every time. I became more confident in what I was saying and people noticed that on the other side of the phone – the results were much better, everyone agreed to help.
 Now, when something similar comes up, that I need to deal with, I just do it and don’t over think, because if I do, all these questions and doubts come up and really all that my mind is trying to do is to limit me. I will not limit myself anymore.

Hope

Self forgiveness on a thought:
I hope this business will work.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect a conversation about my business with a thought “I hope this business will work”.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think the thought “I hope this business will work.”
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself that this thought “I hope this business will work” exists within me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself that a conversation about my business triggers a thought “I hope this business will work”.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself that a conversation about my business exists as a trigger point within me, which triggers the thought “I hope this business will work.”

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hope.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hope for better times.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to trap myself in the belief of hope.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to belief that successful business will just happen by hoping and wishing to be successful – instead of realizing that I separate myself by doing that because there is no “superior source” that will rescue me by hoping.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not take responsibility for myself and stand up for myself and therefore I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that I create my experiences and no one else than myself.
I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that by taking power to something higher than me and hoping and wishing that this business will work, I just separate myself from this world and giving myself an illusion so I will feel better because I trust in someone else than me.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe in the illusion of hope.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not trust myself and therefore I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to give trust to something/someone else separated from me because I don’t want to disappoint myself.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear that I will be disappointed in myself and because of that I rather trust someone or something separated from me (I hope) than myself because I fear that I will fail.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear taking responsibility for myself.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to place my responsibility of self in hope.
I forgive myself that I’ve allowed myself to wait instead of taking responsibility for myself, acting and standing up in creating and manifesting my own world.
I forgive myself that I’ve allowed myself to give hope power over me instead of taking my own power and standing up and taking responsibility for myself in directing my own world.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not take responsibility for myself by trusting myself and not fearing of the outcome and therefore I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that I give trust in something/someone else separated from me because it is more convenient to blame others than taking responsibility for everything that I do and standing up.
I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that I have to stand up and take responsibility for myself because nothing else will support me as I can support myself.

Self corrective statements:
I do not accept and allow myself to hope since I realized that hope is an illusion and by having hope, hoping, I just not take responsibility for myself and stand up.
I will take responsibility for myself rather than hoping because it is me who creates my experiences so I will trust myself rather than trusting something or someone separate from me.
I will not accept and allow fearing failure and because of that avoiding self responsibility because I fear to face myself – therefore I will stand as one and equal and will not separate myself by hoping.
I realize that I create my world and experiences and therefore I will not wait that something “superior” will “save” me because I am responsible for myself in my world and I realize that no one can do and will do something for me than myself.

When a thought “I hope that business will work” which is triggered by a conversation about my ideas comes up – I stop, I breathe – I forgive that thought immediately and also I do not participate in that thought in any way whatsoever, because I know that by hoping and placing trust into something or someone separated from me, I actually don’t want to face myself, take responsibility for myself and stand up. Therefore I don’t create illusion by hoping and wishing for better times, because I know that I am the one who creates my world and experiences and I am the one who creates this reality and not hope. When a thought of hope comes up, I know that I have to deal with a point of not taking responsibility for myself and therefore I do not wait (as I would do before), I face myself and stand up and by doing that, I support myself and have trust in myself and nothing else which is separated from me.

Self forgiveness on emotion:
Fear of failure

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear that I will not succeed.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear that I will fail.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself that I am afraid to be disappointed in myself and instead of facing my fear I rather place trust into something or someone separated from me.
I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that I fear because I do not want to take responsibility for myself.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be afraid of failure and because of that fear I place trust into something else, because I am afraid to face myself and to trust myself, instead of realizing that by placing trust into something separated from me, it will not change anything – I am the one who creates this reality and not hope.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate in emotional experience of fear of failure.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself that fear of failure exists within and as me.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the thought “I hope this business will work” to an emotion of fear of failure.

Realizations and self corrective statements:
I realize that I fear because I do not want to take responsibility for myself and stand up – I am afraid to stand up and actually see what I have accepted and allowed to exist as, therefore I will not accept and allow to be controlled by my creation of fear – instead, I will face myself and I will not try to avoid taking responsibility for myself.
I will not accept and allow to be controlled by fear and if this emotion will come up again, I will forgive myself accordingly because I know that fear is not who and what I am.
When the thought “I hope this business will work” comes up which triggers this fear of failure, I stop and breathe – I forgive myself for participating in that thought and I do not accept and allow to participate in an emotional experience of fear of failure because this is not who I am – instead, I will take responsibility for what I have accepted and allowed and stand up in every moment of every breath.

Self forgiveness on words:
Hope+

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to charge the word “hope” with positive value.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to judge the word hope as ‘positive’, ‘good’ in my mind.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the word “hope” through judging the word “hope” as ‘positive’, ‘good’.

A picture of Jesus praying
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word “hope” to a picture of Jesus praying.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word “hope” within a picture of Jesus praying.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate from the word “hope” and from the picture of Jesus praying through defining word “hope” within a picture of Jesus praying in separation of myself.

Light
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect word “hope” to a word light.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word “hope” within a word light.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate from word “hope” and from word “light” through defining word “hope” within a word light in separation of myself.

Positive outcome
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect word “hope” to positive outcome.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word “hope” within a positive outcome.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate from word “hope” and from positive outcome through defining word “hope” within a positive outcome in separation of myself.

Wish
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect word “hope” to word wish.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word “hope” within wish.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate from word “hope” and from word wish through defining word “hope” within a wish in separation of myself.

A picture of church:
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect word “hope” to a picture of church.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define word “hope” within a picture of church.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate from word “hope” and from a picture of church through defining word “hope” within a picture of church in separation of myself.

Spirituality
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect word “hope” to word spirituality.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define word “hope” within word spirituality.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate from word “hope” and from word spirituality through defining word “hope” within word spirituality in separation of myself.

Re-defining the word hope:

Dictionary definition:
•    the feeling that what is wanted can be had or that events will turn out for the best
•    a particular instance of this feeling
•    grounds for this feeling in a particular instance
•    to look forward to with desire and reasonable confidence
•    to believe, desire, or trust

Sounding the word:
cope  (meaning: to cope – dealing with something)
ope (meaning: open)
rope (cord) – this one would make sense to me – to tie myself up with a rope by hoping because when being tied, I do not have the ability to stand up, take things into my own hands – I just wait for someone to untie me.

New definition:
I start to hope when I do not want to take things into my own hands – meaning not taking the responsibility. When I start to hope, this is a red flag for me to see that I have to stand up and not wait for someone else to do this instead of me, because no one will do it, except me.
Hope, hoping – waiting for someone or something to “save” you because you don’t want to save yourself by taking the responsibility and standing up.

Picture:
A picture of me showing, how I just sold a product to a customer and I am giving it into her hands while she is giving me her money.

SF:
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing a picture of me and a customer exchanging product and money – to exist within me and as me.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect successful business to a picture in my mind of me and a customer exchanging product and money.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define successful business within a picture in my mind of me and a customer exchanging product and goods.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from successful business through defining it in separation of myself within a picture of me and a customer exchanging money and product.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect picture of myself and a customer exchanging product and money to a thought “I hope this business will work”.

Realizations and self corrective statements:
I realize that a picture of me and a customer exchanging money and a product comes up in my mind when a thought (“I hope this business will work”) comes up because I want and desire to run a successful business – because of the desire for having more money.
   
I do not accept and allow to wish, hope and desire to run a successful business, because I realize that whatever will happen it will happen because I am the creator of my reality.

I do not accept and allow myself to desire to have more money because I realize that I can easily be controlled by the money and therefore whenever this thought, picture, desire, wish comes up, I forgive it immediately, investigate further into detail if this haven’t been done already.
Whenever a thought “I hope this business will work” comes up, I do not participate in my mind trying to imagine how the things can go in the future – instead, I forgive myself for thinking that thought and I stop to participate in my mind and I stop to imagine things how it would be in the future.

Fear of kurents

Yesterday was the last day to “drive away” the winter. This is Slovenian tradition every year, when people dress themselves up in costumes and that kind of things. This lasts from Saturday to Tuesday and there are also kurents (this is traditional mask in Slovenia and people are dressed in sheepskin and they have huge cow bells all around their waists and a big mask on their heads) who are involved in this carnival every year. 

 They are collecting hankies from women and they don’t go away if they don’t get it. And nowadays people don’t carry fabric hankies anymore…anyways… Every time when I hear bells from kurent or when I see one I get a strange feeling in my stomach and it is because of the fear. I am afraid when they are close to me because I find their masks very scary looking and the expressions on the masks are like angry and mean. When they were passing by, I was very stiff and I was standing there like a statue because I thought that if I make myself “unnoticeable”, standing in the background (preferably behind some big man) that they won’t bother me or noticed me. 

Also, a memory came up then from my childhood and I remembered that we (my family) were going somewhere and I was dressed in a costume and it was really freezing outside (I remember a big pile of snow outside the building) and kurents came. It was dark and they were even scarier in the dark…so they were fooling around when suddenly two kurents lifted my sister in the air and throw her in that pile of snow. I was soooo scared because I didn’t understand why they would do that and I was scared because I thought that they would do something to my sister and I was also afraid that I was next to go into that snow…I can still see this memory in the pictures in my head like it is real…

Then, while I was trying to sleep, I started wondering that I live in a constant fear. It is insane how fear controls me in almost every moment of my life. So I started to pay attention more on my fears. And they are basically everywhere…